If you need a laugh just pause this at any time.

Vine by Matt King

No but try it


posted 9 hours ago with 125,421 notes
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Accurate post is accurate.

Reminds me of the time a lady told me whip doesn’t melt. Or a guy yelled at me for not understanding him/hearing him because he kept talking on the phone


For those in retail.

I worked in a Lil Caesars and a woman came in and wanted a sausage pizza with no sausage, but got mad when she was given a cheese pizza.

So when I worked at fitting room in Old Navy, a woman told me that a medium top was too small, and that the large top was too large. So she asked me to find her an “x-medium”. Old Navy carries x-small, small, medium, large, x-large, 1x, 2x and 3x. There is no “x-medium”. But she insisted, so I went and found her an “x-medium” (which was just a medium in a different color but the same top, same make, same EVERYTHING) and she goes very happily, “THIS! THIS FITS ME PERFECTLY! THANK YOU SO MUCH! See, you can do anything you can set your mind to!”

I’m a waitress at a big fancy resort, and once a woman asked me for a diet water and when I told her there was no such thing she demanded to see my manager (who then also promptly told her there was no such thing and brought her regular water).
Another occasion of stupidity occurred when a woman had been brought a steak cooked too much for her liking. I offered to take it back and bring her out a new one, cooked a little less, and she said “NO this one’s fine I just want you to cook THIS one a little less.” I then had to get the chef and have him explain why you can’t UNCOOK a steak.

When I was working at dunkin donuts there was this woman in the drive-thru who asked for a lightly toasted croissant and then started complaining that the croissant was warm. And wanted her money back, so she gave me the croissant back and I gave her the money and then she tells me “now i want my new croissant” she wanted a new one for free and as she was screaming at me this guy in a biker gang covered in tattoos leans over the counter in the store and yells “ma’am let me just tell you what we’re all thinking. fuck off, you stupid ****.” I couldn’t stop laughing and she drove away in anger.

Most of the people like in the stories above know that they’re being totally irrational, but also know that if they complain enough they’ll most likely get something free or discounted. So really most of the the nonsensical fucks are actually just cheap fucks with no shame or respect for people.

That last bit of commentary though.

(Source: 9gag)

posted 4 days ago with 287,857 notes
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We freed them…but at what cost?

that ball wasn’t there to trap them

it was to protect us

posted 4 days ago with 267,801 notes
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I really think in the second image Sesshoumaru was with lipstick.

(Source: kikyousama)

posted 4 days ago with 324 notes
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(Source: obe)

posted 5 days ago with 70,524 notes
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  • Eat” the damn Play-doh cookies.
  • Slurp the invisible soup.
  • Pretend that they’re not causing grievous bodily harm as they “brush” your hair.
  • Always be serious when asked what you’d like for dinner, and never say something silly like rabbit soup. Because they will go get their stuffed one off the bed, put it in your best pot, and fill said pot with water. Then place it on your desk.
  • Greet their make believe friends and ask how their day was.
  • Always kiss the teddy bear goodnight. It has feelings too.
  • Always pretend to die when they shoot you.
  • If you are having a fake war with them and you shoot them and they say they can’t die because they are invincible, you don’t shoot them again, because they are invincible.
  • Yes, their drawing does look like a butterfly, not a bunch of jumbled up lines.
  • Them pounding on the piano is the best thing you have ever heard.


no but seriously it’s very important to a child’s development to not be shut down by parents and other caregivers

once when i was little i gave my mum a bowl full of buttons and she got really into pretending it was real food. when she asked me ‘is it soup?’, i turned around, and with the most disapproving glare just went ‘no. it’s buttons’.

Dont do what i did and actually eat the playdough, it tastes like shit

posted 5 days ago with 214,889 notes
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(Source: sandandglass)

posted 5 days ago with 243,334 notes
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The ending is not just the squeaky-clean ending that people expect from a young-adult series. —Francis Lawrence (Source)

(Source: majormockingjay)

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spirit guide bottles

This image belongs to artisan alchemist on etsy. Please source your images when you post them. 

posted 1 week ago with 1,451 notes
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(Source: comecloserfae)

posted 1 week ago with 329 notes
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cat: [makes a small friendly noise]
me: oh my god. ohhhh my god. oh my god. oh my god. oh my god. do it again. oh my god.
posted 1 week ago with 115,522 notes
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